Hmm…good question. Let’s find out!
We often operate in the realm of black or white, right or wrong, good or bad. The word “but” automatically signals that we are choosing one scenario over the other, and often negates or marginalizes another person’s idea or desire. And that’s not necessarily what we mean to do.
Introducing the word “and” invites us to experience the world of abundance vs. scarcity. We can entertain more possibilities and portray a more positive message. When it comes to ourselves–especially if something happens that makes us feel bad–it enables us to acknowledge whatever it is we are experiencing without dismissing everything else that we are.
“I wish I coul play with you now, sweetie, BUT I’m too busy.”
“I wish I could play with you now, sweetie, AND I’d be happy to spend time together once I’m finished with my project.”
“I think your idea is a good start, BUT it needs a lot of work.”
“I think your idea is a good start, AND I think we can make it even better.”
“I’d like to keep a positive attitude about myself, BUT I just got a bad review so I feel like a loser because I messed up.”
“I’m sad that I got a bad review, AND I recognize that I have many talents AND also areas for growth.”
Do you see how fun this game is? Now you try!